Being Flexible

(Originally posted on my old blog September 18, 2008)

About 2 years ago, I had acquired a list of character qualities from a parenting seminar I had attended. It is titled “Christian Virtues” and has a list of them and next to each one is a rather simplified explanation so that even a small child could figure out what they mean. So, I had this on my refridgerator , and I made a copy for each of my kids and hung it in their rooms. I went over each character quality and their meaning and since then will go back to it when I think that they need to be reminded. I really didn’t think that they bothered to look at this list at all in the past two years……….until this week.

About 3 days ago, something happened where things didn’t go for Kylin as he had planned. Usually for him, that means a meltdown. Kids with a autism or a form of it, really like to have things a certain way and they really don’t like to have any kind of change from the status quo. So, anyway, something didn’t go as expected and Kylin dealt with it pretty well and then told me, “I am willing to change if change is needed”. Well that sounded a bit too grammatically correct for him to come up with that statement on his own. So I asked him if he read that somewhere and he said that it was next to “Flexible”. So he finally read something on that list and made a connection. And he was so pleased with himself that he handled the change well.

Then came last night when we went to church. Usually when we go to church on a Wednesday night, he goes to his class at right away. But, we were informed that the kids were going to sit with us during worship and then go to their classes when the parents go to the adult class. That didn’t sit well with Kylin, and I could tell by the look on his face that he was angry and trying hard not to have a meltdown. At some point, the children’s pastor came by, said “Hello” and reached out to shake his hand and asked how he was doing. Kylin stuck his hand out and said, without any joy, “I’m flexible!”. I think that the kids’ pastor was amused.

Possibly one day, he’ll wish that he never learned what “Flexible” means, and he’ll wish that we never knew that he knows what it means.



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